Sarah McGrath, a blue haired, SJW vegan who’s obsessed with Tumblr, has announced that going to bed doesn’t align with her woke lifestyle.
Wearing a shirt made in a Bangladeshi sweatshop, McGrath lectured reporters that, “Sleep perpetuates our capitalistic society by forcing us into buying beds. So let’s put it to rest, no pun intended.”
When a female reporter suggested that you can’t live without sleep, McGrath inexplicably scoffed that she was mansplaining. “I can do anything I want! As a vegan, I’ll spend my nights reading the Communist Manifesto!”
And in a diatribe that screams “I love Twitter mobs,” McGrath then ranted about taxing the rich, mentioned something about Jeff Bezos, proclaimed her love of cancel culture, and finished her monologue with a warning about the Deep State.
McGrath’s parents are concerned that she’s one full moon away from transforming into Amy Schumer.