Now that Biden has been declared winner of the 2020 election, Marlboro has graciously sent every American a cigarette.
“We thought it was the least we could do, considering how long that tease of an election lasted, Americans could use it.” Said a spokesperson for Marlboro.
The single cigarette comes with a note that reads “Thanks for hanging in there, pony boy”
Many have said they view this as the perfect way to end this election.
“It just felt like we were going at it all night with no clear outcome. There were so many times I thought, I can’t take it anymore. This is just too much to handle. I really appreciate Marlboro sending me a cigarette. Lord knows I needed it” – Tammy, 34, Idaho, registered voter.
Marlboro has made it clear that this was a one time thing and have politely asked that people stop calling them at three in the morning for “round two”