After weeks of outcry from the medical field over doses of vaccine being wasted due to expiration, the CDC releases new information explaining how expired vaccines are still perfectly fine to be used in banana bread.
The CDC posted on their official website details regarding this new information.
“We have heard the complaints and we have devised a solution. Here at the CDC we agree wholeheartedly that vaccine wastage is the single most preventable logistics problem facing the medical community right now. After meeting with our top scientists and speaking with all of our grandmas, we have found that expired vaccines can still be used to make delicious banana bread. Rather than throwing out a perfectly good vaccine, we can utilize it for a tasty baked treat that everyone can enjoy.”
Those within the medical community have embraced this solution while the average citizen has vented their concerns over this vaccine banana bread. One mother in Ohio made clear her stance against the banana bread.
“I just can’t trust what these doctors are doing to those banana breads. Sure, they might smell delicious and the CDC might even say it’s perfectly safe but as a concerned mother I can’t knowingly let my children eat those pastries. I heard that Bill Gates is putting nanomachines in all of the vaccine banana bread so that they can track people. None of these people are chefs, they’re doctors, what could they possibly know about baking banana bread? I think if you look at the real data and read your own cookbooks then you’ll start to see a lot of the things that I’m seeing and then you probably wouldn’t feel so comfortable feeding your children that slop. Personally, I like feeding my children things that I know are healthy like McDonald’s or dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets that have been stored in my freezer for six years.”
There are some reports of people having adverse effects to the vaccine banana bread such as tummy aches and sugar rushes, but overall this new set of guidelines has proved beneficial for the medical community at large.