A suburban man in Ohio has decided to use his new quarantine free-time to strike up a feud with his neighbor. The decision comes after many years of pleasant interactions between the two households.
“I just felt like I wasn’t doing anything productive during this whole lockdown thing. Now that my neighbor keeps his porch light on until 8:00 PM, I’ve found a new way to keep my mind busy. He’s a great guy, but I think he would understand me blowing this way out of proportion and refusing to speak to him for six months.”
The Ohio man went on to explain his reasoning.
“It doesn’t actually affect me or my life, but what else am I supposed to do when all of my basic needs and general wants have been met? Just sit here? No way.”
Studies have shown that most middle class families have been facing increasing pressure to find a reason to complain during the COVID-19 pandemic.
Caps Lock News will update our readers on this incredibly lukewarm story as it develops.